birth of a badass

"Everyone likes a badass."

Words that haunt my ears at the present moment.

Alan visited this weekend... and he told me that my tragic flaw is that I am too nice. UGH. What was all that shit that I went through back during junior year in KKPsi. I thought the scars from that second semester made me enough of a punk. Apparently not.

I also thought that the bourgeoise comments I tend to make about people, their homes, and their educations was pretty bad ass as well. Alas, no.

Just as I was told in high school, and the early college years, I am a fucking nice guy that can only be seen as "the friend."

WELL, FUCK THAT. Seriously.

So, I am nice. Well, I do believe that the last 2 months, on top of other stupid shit that has just built up in my life will allow me to truly say a big "fuck you" to a particular someone, among a plethora of other lesser individuals that I have had the displeasure of entertaining as associates in my life.

This is the birth of a badass... This is me being angry for all the times I've been lied to, led on, fucked around with, thought of as just "the friend," shat on, bitched out, punked, walked on, called out, made fun of, rejected, scorned, stood up, taken advantage of, talked down to, criticized, condemned... all of that crucial shit. And it has ALL happened to me. Much of it by just one or a few people.

Y'all can all get hit by a CAT bus... and then have a 3 point turn executed on you.

I don't care. I'm all about getting even now. For about 23 years, I have lived my life as the son of a baptist preacher and a social worker. I was raised to be polite, caring, compassionate, and courteous. The thing my parents failed to tell me was that being as such would get me treated like a peon. You know, all of their guidance has gotten me this far. I graduated from school... I have a job... I have a house. But now it's time to play by society's rules a little bit. Funny thing is, all that advice from them and being all perfect and angelic really did do a lot of good in my younger years. I've never been arrested, or in jail, and I have never lost a job or flunked out of school either. Those were the guidelines for growing up. So, I made it. I grew up. Now it's time to be a grown up... and even as the Bible says "act peacefully if at all possible."

Well, damn... it ain't possible with these fuckers running around on the streets today. Everyone is out for their own self gratification... That isn't what I am planning on doing with my newfound badassness.... I just plan on "acting peacefully if at all possible..." and then to hell with everyone else who doesn't act peacefully with me. I'm not gonna be a punk.

Another funny thing about all of this is the fact that some people think of Hamilton as "the rock" who can withstand beating and badgering... who will stay there regardless... kinda like something timeless. I imagine some people think of me like, "Oh, Hamilton won't mind," or, "He'll get over it," or, "I can do it this way, because it's only Hamilton."

Well, asphyxiate, motherfucker. The rock's got fucking sharp edges.

So fuck y'all... all of y'all.
If y'all don't like me, blow me.
-Dr. Dre