It's 10:35 and I am preparing to go to bed. w00t! I haven't written in a while... but I thought I'd catch you and Smouse up on a few things.
1. I wore letters today for the first time since this summer. KKcrap has kinda been at a minimum as of late. Hopefully it will stay that way.
2. Alpha Phi Omega is well underway... so is the controversy...
3. I'm not really crushing anymore... on that individual that sang in my dream... although I think Alanis Morissette said it best when she named her album Supposed Former Infatuation Junkie.
4. This Year's Love is currently the song playing on the soundtrack of my life.
5. I teach my first lesson on Wednesday and I am actually pretty nervous.
6. I'm doing a pretty good job hiding all of my internal ish... as always, no one really understands me...
Monday, September 27, 2004
Sunday, September 19, 2004
lets talk about something...
...because it's been a while since I have talked about ANYTHING. Last time I wrote in here, Smouse was the topic of discussion. This time, it's not going to be... We are going to tackle one of the many Ham Rules. Rule Number 9: No Self-Proclaimed Crushes. I tend to break this rule a lot. One may consider me spineless, or passive as some have said, but for some reason, I tend to break this rule a lot... this one which goes alont with Rule Number 4, The Alicia Keys Rule: Don't Fall. Yeah. I suck at these two. But I was thinking this weekend (for some VERY ODD reason, being on away band trips makes me think about things like this), what's so wrong with having a crush. I mean, I'm not saying that I have one or not. What I am saying is, I feel like I have behaved pretty well... Since being 21 and back at school, I haven't let emotional ish really drag me down a lot... I mean, the only thing that is pretty sad is my AIM profile... but it basically just gives a visual representation of a song lyric that I really relate to. Actually, I don't relate to This Year's Love at all. There is once again no love this year. Oh well. I have decided that is probably the way it is going to be.
I remember in 12th grade... like it was yesterday. We were in Teacher Cadets and Mr. T asked how many of us thought we would probably get married. I was the only one that didn't raise my hand. I have this sense... it's weird. Not just about marriage, but everything. If I can't see something in my mind happening, then I can pretty much tell it's not going to happen. Most of the time I usually apply it to taking trips and stuff. If I can't forsee it happening, I don't really look forward to it. Honestly, I never see anyone returning love for me in the way that I give them love. Like, I can see Kate and Deni walking down the aisle... I can even see my 30-something year old Aunt Irene getting married. But I can't see me doing it. Not just that, but I can't see myself even dating anyone. As sad as it sounds... I think it's the truth.
How do I feel about this? Well... it sucks. It sucks really bad. But, nuns and monks never marry. Maybe I am to be in the number with them. But that leads me to another question... Is there really anything wrong with self proclaimed crushes and falling? I mean, I know nothing is ever going to happen. So if I give into the attraction, nothing is harmed right. I have already told myself that I'm going to end up being a loner (a loner in a very posh home wearing really nice clothing, mind you). There really isn't anything wrong with crushing or falling.
But frankly, it's just not very attractive... to see someone swooning over someone else. It becomes annoying and frustrating... not just for onlookers, but for the person crushing. I'm not ever doing that again. I swear from this moment (9:11 pm on Sunday September, 19, 2004). No crushing. As for falling... you can't really help that. It's a bitch, it is... but there are some things about people that just make a spot in your heart tickle when you think about them... Honestly, I had a dream last night about someone... they sang a song. Not to me, but they sang... I feel that singing is one of the most beautiful forms of expression. When I heard this individual sing, it was beautiful... I cry when some people sing... I just do. I can't take it. Some people's singing evokes emotion within me. I woke up and wanted to cry. It was only a dream... the person prolly can't sing at all... but they sang in my dream.
Anyway... call it falling... I'm not going to crush anymore. Or maybe that's backwards... don't fall, but it's okay to crush... because in all seriousness, crushing is pretty innocent. People crush on movie stars. They can't really fall for movie stars. Falling would entail knowing someone and wanting to be with them. Crushing is pretty much just a feeling felt at a distance... you see someone walking on campus and they are cute, so you crush. Yeah. So no FALLING. Crushing... that's what you can't help. As for my particular situation with this singer... is that falling or crushing? Singing, to me, is a big deal. Hellifiknow. Nothing is going to happen. Just another notch on the old oak log. Another crush that won't turn into anything but a grain of sand in my hourglass of life.
I remember in 12th grade... like it was yesterday. We were in Teacher Cadets and Mr. T asked how many of us thought we would probably get married. I was the only one that didn't raise my hand. I have this sense... it's weird. Not just about marriage, but everything. If I can't see something in my mind happening, then I can pretty much tell it's not going to happen. Most of the time I usually apply it to taking trips and stuff. If I can't forsee it happening, I don't really look forward to it. Honestly, I never see anyone returning love for me in the way that I give them love. Like, I can see Kate and Deni walking down the aisle... I can even see my 30-something year old Aunt Irene getting married. But I can't see me doing it. Not just that, but I can't see myself even dating anyone. As sad as it sounds... I think it's the truth.
How do I feel about this? Well... it sucks. It sucks really bad. But, nuns and monks never marry. Maybe I am to be in the number with them. But that leads me to another question... Is there really anything wrong with self proclaimed crushes and falling? I mean, I know nothing is ever going to happen. So if I give into the attraction, nothing is harmed right. I have already told myself that I'm going to end up being a loner (a loner in a very posh home wearing really nice clothing, mind you). There really isn't anything wrong with crushing or falling.
But frankly, it's just not very attractive... to see someone swooning over someone else. It becomes annoying and frustrating... not just for onlookers, but for the person crushing. I'm not ever doing that again. I swear from this moment (9:11 pm on Sunday September, 19, 2004). No crushing. As for falling... you can't really help that. It's a bitch, it is... but there are some things about people that just make a spot in your heart tickle when you think about them... Honestly, I had a dream last night about someone... they sang a song. Not to me, but they sang... I feel that singing is one of the most beautiful forms of expression. When I heard this individual sing, it was beautiful... I cry when some people sing... I just do. I can't take it. Some people's singing evokes emotion within me. I woke up and wanted to cry. It was only a dream... the person prolly can't sing at all... but they sang in my dream.
Anyway... call it falling... I'm not going to crush anymore. Or maybe that's backwards... don't fall, but it's okay to crush... because in all seriousness, crushing is pretty innocent. People crush on movie stars. They can't really fall for movie stars. Falling would entail knowing someone and wanting to be with them. Crushing is pretty much just a feeling felt at a distance... you see someone walking on campus and they are cute, so you crush. Yeah. So no FALLING. Crushing... that's what you can't help. As for my particular situation with this singer... is that falling or crushing? Singing, to me, is a big deal. Hellifiknow. Nothing is going to happen. Just another notch on the old oak log. Another crush that won't turn into anything but a grain of sand in my hourglass of life.
Monday, September 13, 2004
i have a clue
...and within 28 minutes, I have a guess as to your identity, Smouse. First of all, I pose this question... is it possible that you were up at 6:53 and are up now at 7:21 like me... and getting ready to go to your practicum school??? ;-)
please notice the post time...
At the bottom of this entry, it says the time that the entry was posted. Smouse, honey... I want you to take a good look at the time at the bottom of it. Yes. 6:53 am. While you were probably enjoying sweet slumber, I am up writing about you. And you know what? I SHOULD be getting ready for school. Technically, I am supposed to be at Central Elementary at 7:30... but no... you are more important to me, Smouse. Actually... your identity or lack thereof is driving me nuts.
I was talking to Erin on Saturday before the game... walking up to where we start the parade (also take not of this, Smouse... shouldn't the performance be on our minds, not the identity of a fabulous person named Smouse?), and Erin asks if I have any clue as to who you are. And I say no. Then she proceeds to tell me about how in high school, she used to get candy grams and stuff from some mysterious person named "C.M." (or something like that). She checked the yearbook for all the guys with those initials, but she came up with nothing. To this day, Erin has no clue who this character was.
Smouse, I don't want to go on living like this! THROW ME A FREAKING BONE, HERE! But I really don't want you to just come out and say it... it would be much cooler if you gave me hints. But I'll go ahead and tell you this. You are a girl, you aren't in band ('cause you posted a comment during band rehearsal), I am probably not the only person you know in band, and (of course) I think you go to Clemson. I have no idea where Smouse came from... whether it is a nickname, or some derivative of your real name, or whether you like mice (which would make me think that you are an AKA... I love them).
Anyway, Smouse, I need to go get ready so I can sit through another day of class at Central. Please take this blog to heart. With every comment you write, you lead me on like a Tri-Dilta leads on a frat pledge (as Sarah would say).
I was talking to Erin on Saturday before the game... walking up to where we start the parade (also take not of this, Smouse... shouldn't the performance be on our minds, not the identity of a fabulous person named Smouse?), and Erin asks if I have any clue as to who you are. And I say no. Then she proceeds to tell me about how in high school, she used to get candy grams and stuff from some mysterious person named "C.M." (or something like that). She checked the yearbook for all the guys with those initials, but she came up with nothing. To this day, Erin has no clue who this character was.
Smouse, I don't want to go on living like this! THROW ME A FREAKING BONE, HERE! But I really don't want you to just come out and say it... it would be much cooler if you gave me hints. But I'll go ahead and tell you this. You are a girl, you aren't in band ('cause you posted a comment during band rehearsal), I am probably not the only person you know in band, and (of course) I think you go to Clemson. I have no idea where Smouse came from... whether it is a nickname, or some derivative of your real name, or whether you like mice (which would make me think that you are an AKA... I love them).
Anyway, Smouse, I need to go get ready so I can sit through another day of class at Central. Please take this blog to heart. With every comment you write, you lead me on like a Tri-Dilta leads on a frat pledge (as Sarah would say).
Friday, September 10, 2004
losers
I am surrounded by losers... in every shape form and fashion. I am sorry... and I don't mean to be mean. But when people are mean or just plain old intolerable, they get the title of LOSER. I am just a little upset with several people and groups of people right now. Due to the popularity of this blog and how much of an overnight celebrity I am (I know you liked my rendition earlier today), I am not going to name names and point fingers. Lets just say... George W. Bush wannabe, prehistoric animal, a bunch of retard moo cows, daytime children's programming, Designing Women, the whole R&B community... they all piss me off.
LOSERS
pen and paper
I hope that this writing thing takes me somewhere... I just realized that I am pretty much obsessed... last night in an interview with the entire chapter of Alpha PHI Omega (not Chi... those chicks kinda had it out for me after The Tiger last week), someone asked me what 3 things I would take with me if I were stuck on a desert island. Without hesitation, I said a pen and paper... to document the situation. Wow. I am a writing FIEND.
As for The Tiger, I have gotten a vast assortment of reactions from it... most people LOVED it. Some other people didn't enjoy it so much... you know, those sorors of the lyre... After talking to Cassie and Kate about it, I decided to apologize to the president, because even though I didn't mention her name or Alpha Chi Omega, the entire Greek community knows who it is about. The funny thing is... DAMN... that's a buttload of people. So, nest week in The Tiger, I'm going to talk about how small Clemson really is... and how easy it is to get 150 girls mad at you.
Which leads me to my next observation... Dang a lot of people know me. Not EVEN trying to boast. I mean seriously. There are just an immense amount of people who claim to know me. I was talking to Rachie the other day and she said that being in the band means that you don't have a personal life... Well, along with being in the band, being a drum major, and now being a columnist in The Tiger, everyone seems to know Hamilton. I am beginning to feel the way I felt last year... as Alanis Morrissette says in "Not the Doctor:" "I don't want to be your idol, you see this pedastal is high and I'm afraid of heights." AND NOW BEFORE YOU GO THINKIN' I'M HOT ISH, Jason Grygier told me that that was how I was feeling... I don't think I'm an idol... you little groundling, you...
Anyway, another song comes to mind when I think of living in the limelight... "Overnight Celebrity."
Why don't we...
Write somethin' these ho's will like?
Write shit that's so damn tight
Ham P, you told 'em right?
I can make you a celebrity overnight
Give you ice with the blogs I write
Everybody thinks they know me, right?
Every Saturday I wear white
Holy shit! I'm a celebrity overnight
Seriously... I'm not trying to have a big head. But I just can't get over how many people claimed to know me after my article last week. Ironically though (and this will be addressed in next week's article), at Clemson, everyone is pretty much a celebrity... it just takes you doing something that draws attention to you for you to notice...
As for The Tiger, I have gotten a vast assortment of reactions from it... most people LOVED it. Some other people didn't enjoy it so much... you know, those sorors of the lyre... After talking to Cassie and Kate about it, I decided to apologize to the president, because even though I didn't mention her name or Alpha Chi Omega, the entire Greek community knows who it is about. The funny thing is... DAMN... that's a buttload of people. So, nest week in The Tiger, I'm going to talk about how small Clemson really is... and how easy it is to get 150 girls mad at you.
Which leads me to my next observation... Dang a lot of people know me. Not EVEN trying to boast. I mean seriously. There are just an immense amount of people who claim to know me. I was talking to Rachie the other day and she said that being in the band means that you don't have a personal life... Well, along with being in the band, being a drum major, and now being a columnist in The Tiger, everyone seems to know Hamilton. I am beginning to feel the way I felt last year... as Alanis Morrissette says in "Not the Doctor:" "I don't want to be your idol, you see this pedastal is high and I'm afraid of heights." AND NOW BEFORE YOU GO THINKIN' I'M HOT ISH, Jason Grygier told me that that was how I was feeling... I don't think I'm an idol... you little groundling, you...
Anyway, another song comes to mind when I think of living in the limelight... "Overnight Celebrity."
Why don't we...
Write somethin' these ho's will like?
Write shit that's so damn tight
Ham P, you told 'em right?
I can make you a celebrity overnight
Give you ice with the blogs I write
Everybody thinks they know me, right?
Every Saturday I wear white
Holy shit! I'm a celebrity overnight
Seriously... I'm not trying to have a big head. But I just can't get over how many people claimed to know me after my article last week. Ironically though (and this will be addressed in next week's article), at Clemson, everyone is pretty much a celebrity... it just takes you doing something that draws attention to you for you to notice...
Monday, September 06, 2004
sounding off
I am pissed. Why? Well, it is not because of our dear friend Adria, nor is it because I don't know the identity of the wonderful person that is Smouse. I am pissed because I am not black enough? No, don't get me wrong, I am not trying to be as dark as James Hanna... according to some people, he is not black enough either (how in the hell, I have no idea).
The reason James and I are not black enough apparently has nothing to do with the color of our skin. I don't know when black started being defined as a lifestyle, not just a race. But apparently, I deny my blackness. I don't live like a black individual ought. But then again, I guess the whole reason that I don't is because I am ignorant... I don't know HOW a black individual ought.
Now, if one of these utterly tragic people who are telling me that I deny my blackness thinks that because I don't hang out with only black people, talk a certain way, walk a certain way, eat certain foods, or live a certain way, then they are a disgrace to the ever so fabulous color that is their skin. Being black is not about what you do, wear, say, eat, or live. Being black is simply that... being black. Why can't people see that walking around in a diverse community wearing a skin color that is not the majority is a beautiful thing? That is special enough. Why is it that some black people feel that they must make a name for themselves, or (THANK YOU EVER SO MUCH) for EVERYONE. They have to all congregate together because "nobody knows the trouble (we)'ve seen / nobody knows (our) sorrow." My GOD! Grow up and get your mind out of your little afro-centric mind. This is not a black and white world. This is a world of MANY colors and types of people... to shut oneself off to only the people that are like them is ridiculous.
Now, even saying all of this, I guess that I am not the most valid source of opinion. I was raised in a predominantly white community and have always had more white friends than black friends... but you know one thing? Never in my existence, have I ever wanted to be white. What kind of person would I be if I was white? I would not be the person that I am today. I have learned so much about life from being black, and I am proud to say that I am one. I am NOT proud, however, to associate with black individuals that are so shallow to think that ALL black people are supposed to hang out with one another and be the ever so strong backbone for each other because it's such a cruel world and the white man is all about trampling all over us and seeing us fail! Forgive me please, but BULL SHIT!
If ANYONE is prejudice... it is black people. I am quite serious when I say this. In the past, white individuals were people who looked down on blacks and did not like to see us prosper. But thanks to individuals like Martin Luther King, Jr. who not only wanted to see black people succeed, but see blacks and whites live together harmoniously, many white people have learned from the ways of their forfathers and accept blacks and other minorities as fellow human beings. The world is too diverse for them to truly think that they as white people are a superior race. There are so many different races and cultures with wonderful things about them for whites to think that. Of course there are some who are still grand wizards and grand dragons and stuff, but the decent white people FAR outweigh the indecent ones. As for the black community, I am almost certain that there are more of them that are prejudiced against white people than whites that are prejudiced against them. How do I know this? Why is it common to see a couple black people scattered amongst a group of white people, but when there are a few white people in the midst of many black people, people start scratching their heads? Why are there colleges and universities, and then there are historically black colleges and universities? Why do I get looked down on by individuals at South Carolina State, because there are more black people at their entire school than there are at my school? Why is it okay to have BET, when if there was a WET, Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton would raise hell and call a boycott for cable television?
I'm not saying that there needs to be a WET or there need to be schools solely for white individuals. All I'm saying is, the time has passed for segregation. Look at this... George W. Bush, Gen. Colin Powell, and Condoleeza Rice; Simon Cowell, Paula Abdul, and Randy Jackson (they even got a latina up in there!); Jay Leno and Kevin Eubanks. I mean, come on. OPEN YOUR EYES, PEOPLE. THE WORLD IS NOT AS TERRIBLE AS YOU THINK IT IS. IT IS OKAY TO HAVE FRIENDS THAT AREN'T EXACTLY LIKE YOU!
And the next time you think I am denying my blackness, ask yourself, if you are just denying yourself as a human being.
The reason James and I are not black enough apparently has nothing to do with the color of our skin. I don't know when black started being defined as a lifestyle, not just a race. But apparently, I deny my blackness. I don't live like a black individual ought. But then again, I guess the whole reason that I don't is because I am ignorant... I don't know HOW a black individual ought.
Now, if one of these utterly tragic people who are telling me that I deny my blackness thinks that because I don't hang out with only black people, talk a certain way, walk a certain way, eat certain foods, or live a certain way, then they are a disgrace to the ever so fabulous color that is their skin. Being black is not about what you do, wear, say, eat, or live. Being black is simply that... being black. Why can't people see that walking around in a diverse community wearing a skin color that is not the majority is a beautiful thing? That is special enough. Why is it that some black people feel that they must make a name for themselves, or (THANK YOU EVER SO MUCH) for EVERYONE. They have to all congregate together because "nobody knows the trouble (we)'ve seen / nobody knows (our) sorrow." My GOD! Grow up and get your mind out of your little afro-centric mind. This is not a black and white world. This is a world of MANY colors and types of people... to shut oneself off to only the people that are like them is ridiculous.
Now, even saying all of this, I guess that I am not the most valid source of opinion. I was raised in a predominantly white community and have always had more white friends than black friends... but you know one thing? Never in my existence, have I ever wanted to be white. What kind of person would I be if I was white? I would not be the person that I am today. I have learned so much about life from being black, and I am proud to say that I am one. I am NOT proud, however, to associate with black individuals that are so shallow to think that ALL black people are supposed to hang out with one another and be the ever so strong backbone for each other because it's such a cruel world and the white man is all about trampling all over us and seeing us fail! Forgive me please, but BULL SHIT!
If ANYONE is prejudice... it is black people. I am quite serious when I say this. In the past, white individuals were people who looked down on blacks and did not like to see us prosper. But thanks to individuals like Martin Luther King, Jr. who not only wanted to see black people succeed, but see blacks and whites live together harmoniously, many white people have learned from the ways of their forfathers and accept blacks and other minorities as fellow human beings. The world is too diverse for them to truly think that they as white people are a superior race. There are so many different races and cultures with wonderful things about them for whites to think that. Of course there are some who are still grand wizards and grand dragons and stuff, but the decent white people FAR outweigh the indecent ones. As for the black community, I am almost certain that there are more of them that are prejudiced against white people than whites that are prejudiced against them. How do I know this? Why is it common to see a couple black people scattered amongst a group of white people, but when there are a few white people in the midst of many black people, people start scratching their heads? Why are there colleges and universities, and then there are historically black colleges and universities? Why do I get looked down on by individuals at South Carolina State, because there are more black people at their entire school than there are at my school? Why is it okay to have BET, when if there was a WET, Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton would raise hell and call a boycott for cable television?
I'm not saying that there needs to be a WET or there need to be schools solely for white individuals. All I'm saying is, the time has passed for segregation. Look at this... George W. Bush, Gen. Colin Powell, and Condoleeza Rice; Simon Cowell, Paula Abdul, and Randy Jackson (they even got a latina up in there!); Jay Leno and Kevin Eubanks. I mean, come on. OPEN YOUR EYES, PEOPLE. THE WORLD IS NOT AS TERRIBLE AS YOU THINK IT IS. IT IS OKAY TO HAVE FRIENDS THAT AREN'T EXACTLY LIKE YOU!
And the next time you think I am denying my blackness, ask yourself, if you are just denying yourself as a human being.
Friday, September 03, 2004
smouse
Okay, now you faithful readers know that it is not uncommon for me to devote a whole entry to one person... that is what I am doing in this case. Smouse... whoever you are... I love you. I am serious. I don't mean the play play kind of love that people say to their friends when they sign letters, or the type of love that people say when they say the obligatory "Love ya!" Just for future reference, that type of love is pretty much just hearsay... if someone really loves you, they would say "I love you." As I have just said to this Smouse individual.
Smouse, I love you in the way that means if you were about to get hit by a car, I would run out and push you out of the way and put my own life in danger. I love you so much that if I had to choose between money and you, I'd choose you. Yes. I love you that much. Why? Well, its obviously because I have no earthly idea who you are, but you still motivate me through your little messages. I mean, dang... I really do feel like I have a fairy godmother (by the way, Smouse... that just told me that you are obviously a girl... thanks for that). The only scary thing about this is that this person probably sees me and I have no clue about it. Weird. It's kinda like how I ended up on the back of The Orange & White and I didn't even see anyone take my picture.
Anyway, thank you Smouse... for the anonymous encouragement. It is HIGHLY appreciated. And just so you know, Smouse, Tiger Band is definitely ready to "Shake the Southland" this afternoon at the First Friday parade and pep rally and tomorrow at the football game. I have a whole new outlook on the show since Wednesday, Smouse. I talked to Jeff Norman, our visual consultant and drum major coach and he told me that I need to get back into the show. Apparently, he and other people in the band have been able to tell that I haven't been as excited about the piece since before the pre-season performance 2 Saturdays ago. A lot of the problem with the show and the tempo problems and stuff aren't my fault. Actually, it's not really one person's fault or one section's fault. Everyone is doing their best, Smouse... it's just that in a way we are all trying so hard that we aren't really all on the same page. The thing that is going to make things a lot better is an INSANELY tight connection with the drumline and a RIDICULOUSLY tight connection between the band and me... ME... NOT the drumline. No, Smouse, I don't want all the attention on me, it's just that they are listening down and not watching. And now that I think about it, they need to be watching A drum major... not necessarily me, but either Kate, Leroy, or Lindsey would work too.
Okay, Smouse... sorry to bore you with more band stuff. Speaking of band though, Smouse... today, the band was liberated from years of scrutiny and persecution. My editorial about dear Alpha Chi president was published... although you and everyone else should know, Smouse, that I did not say that it was the Alpha Chi president. I said that it was "a sorority president." No names were mentioned, so I did not slander that tragic girl in front of the entire Clemson community. But, I will slander her here online... the whole internet community. MUAH HA HA HA HA! Sorry, Smouse... I got carried away there. Anyway, Betsy and Erin both left me messages saying that it was a good article. Willene just called me saying she had to give me my props about the article and she said the girl had what was coming to her. HAHA! I haven't even seen the thing in print yet. We went to campus at midnight last night to see if they had put any out yet, but they hadn't. So, I am waiting on Nick to get home with one so I can see it... and the tragic picture I took Wednesday after being in the classroom all day and a 2 hour band practice...
So anyway Smouse, once again, thanks a lot for being there... wherever you are. You rock my face off. I want to be you for halloween.
Smouse, I love you in the way that means if you were about to get hit by a car, I would run out and push you out of the way and put my own life in danger. I love you so much that if I had to choose between money and you, I'd choose you. Yes. I love you that much. Why? Well, its obviously because I have no earthly idea who you are, but you still motivate me through your little messages. I mean, dang... I really do feel like I have a fairy godmother (by the way, Smouse... that just told me that you are obviously a girl... thanks for that). The only scary thing about this is that this person probably sees me and I have no clue about it. Weird. It's kinda like how I ended up on the back of The Orange & White and I didn't even see anyone take my picture.
Anyway, thank you Smouse... for the anonymous encouragement. It is HIGHLY appreciated. And just so you know, Smouse, Tiger Band is definitely ready to "Shake the Southland" this afternoon at the First Friday parade and pep rally and tomorrow at the football game. I have a whole new outlook on the show since Wednesday, Smouse. I talked to Jeff Norman, our visual consultant and drum major coach and he told me that I need to get back into the show. Apparently, he and other people in the band have been able to tell that I haven't been as excited about the piece since before the pre-season performance 2 Saturdays ago. A lot of the problem with the show and the tempo problems and stuff aren't my fault. Actually, it's not really one person's fault or one section's fault. Everyone is doing their best, Smouse... it's just that in a way we are all trying so hard that we aren't really all on the same page. The thing that is going to make things a lot better is an INSANELY tight connection with the drumline and a RIDICULOUSLY tight connection between the band and me... ME... NOT the drumline. No, Smouse, I don't want all the attention on me, it's just that they are listening down and not watching. And now that I think about it, they need to be watching A drum major... not necessarily me, but either Kate, Leroy, or Lindsey would work too.
Okay, Smouse... sorry to bore you with more band stuff. Speaking of band though, Smouse... today, the band was liberated from years of scrutiny and persecution. My editorial about dear Alpha Chi president was published... although you and everyone else should know, Smouse, that I did not say that it was the Alpha Chi president. I said that it was "a sorority president." No names were mentioned, so I did not slander that tragic girl in front of the entire Clemson community. But, I will slander her here online... the whole internet community. MUAH HA HA HA HA! Sorry, Smouse... I got carried away there. Anyway, Betsy and Erin both left me messages saying that it was a good article. Willene just called me saying she had to give me my props about the article and she said the girl had what was coming to her. HAHA! I haven't even seen the thing in print yet. We went to campus at midnight last night to see if they had put any out yet, but they hadn't. So, I am waiting on Nick to get home with one so I can see it... and the tragic picture I took Wednesday after being in the classroom all day and a 2 hour band practice...
So anyway Smouse, once again, thanks a lot for being there... wherever you are. You rock my face off. I want to be you for halloween.
Monday, August 30, 2004
the problem with captain
OMG. And the saga continues... Captain from Castille. Dr. Spede only wants the captain heading west at say... 20 knots. The band wants the captain heading west at like 220 knots. So today, I decided to talk to good ol' Spedie about this dilemma and he told me that for practice sake, we need to take it slow... and that it is too early in the season to take it that pre-season performance/Madison Scouts speed. Okay, I said. We both got up on the podium (I hate it when he stands up there with me... I get so nervous) and he said, "Lemme see 168 (which is the supposed tempo of Captain)." I showed it to him, and he agreed that it was correct. Okay, so we are on the same page... I start out the song... "tweeeet... tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet." WHAT THE HELL?! The drummers have taken control of the captain's ship, turned it around and have it heading toward land at like 300 knots! And at this point, even I was scared it was going to fall apart.
Well, after THAT was over, there was tons of cheers... the band and even some of the people sitting on the sidelines LOVED it. I'm serious... CHEERS. At the next water break, there were kudos all around. I couldn't even take credit for it. It was the drummers. I am so appreciative of them, but why did they do it?
Even with how great it was, I feel like I don't have any control of it.
DM/CUD practice is tomorrow... answers, please...
And also... answers as to who Smouse is! Thanks for the comment... I appreciated it. But, who are you?
Well, after THAT was over, there was tons of cheers... the band and even some of the people sitting on the sidelines LOVED it. I'm serious... CHEERS. At the next water break, there were kudos all around. I couldn't even take credit for it. It was the drummers. I am so appreciative of them, but why did they do it?
Even with how great it was, I feel like I don't have any control of it.
DM/CUD practice is tomorrow... answers, please...
And also... answers as to who Smouse is! Thanks for the comment... I appreciated it. But, who are you?
Saturday, August 28, 2004
the last weekend of freedom
Well, this is it... the final Saturday before football season. In all honesty, I have to say that I am ready for a little football. But, today has been really nice. I got to sleep in, then go to THE BRAND NEW WAL MART IN CENTRAL (I kid you not... that is how excited I am about that place). Nick and I went there with Bobby, who would definitely have to be coolest freshman so far. We went to tragic Anderson Mall too. It was all together a really good day. Right now, I am takin' a little load off, since I just got done cleaning up Justin's and my bathroom (it's ironic how I don't mind doing it here, but I HATE doing it when I'm at home).
Anyway, I know that I have become severely tragic when it comes to updating this thing. My life is really busy, and while I can't make any promises really, I promise to write at least once a week. As for dumb pe0ple... I see dumb pe0ple living on in The Tiger this year. I mean, I did write about a dumb person for my first column. It was about the re-re Alpha Chi president. Love Alpha Chi... just not her.
In other news, Tiger Band is going well (I know you were wondering... it seems like all anyone ever asks me anymore is "How is band?"). I think by Saturday, we will be krunk like no other. We are definitely getting there. The only problem I have is with my song. Yes... f-ing Captain. It's a GREAT song... don't get me wrong (yay for a rhyme), but I feel like Dr. Spede is stifling how great it could be! Yesterday at practice, I was so pissed. He told me that I was too excited and that I was pushing the band on too much. He also said that last Saturday at the pre-season performance, it was incredibly too fast. The ironic thing about this, is that EVERYONE in the band thought that it was so much better that fast. Dr. Spede almost had an anxiety attack, but in the end it turned out really well. I can clearly remember Dr. Buyer telling me good job as soon as I got down from the podium. It was fast, but I had it in control. Yesterday, he basically told me that I was pushing them too much and that I was making them go too fast. What I don't understand is how I could start the right speed and then all of a sudden speed up in different parts of the song... There are no accelerandos in the song. I'll tell you what my theory is... I start out the tragically slow tempo that Dr. Spede wants it and the drums, who have told me before, take it at the speed they know it to be. That means that even if I start it super slow or outrageously fast, they are going to pretty much play it the speed it is supposed to be... UNLESS a "Crazy in Love" moment happens... where I hear the drum captain tell the line to take it at whatever speed I want it to be and they just follow along (that happened at 90 minutes before kickoff once last year). Anyway, I start really slow because Dr. Spede wants me to, and the drums take it faster because they can... the rest of the band pretty much has all concentration between marching and their music... so I am pretty much aware that they are not watching me... BUT the drummers are... and they expect me to be with them because they ARE looking at me... despite whether the tempo I counted off was to their approval or not. So, I end up wuRkeng it hard up on the podium, while the band who is not watching me listens down to the super-psychotic drummers who are hacking at whatever speed they feel is necessary. You see the pattern? It's confusing I know, but I do believe this is the problem. And this is the solution: PLAY THE SONG FASTER. Everyone will enjoy it faster... mainly the drummers and I, 'cause I feel that the winds are gonna go with whatever we do. So, I think I'm going to talk to Spede about maybe taking it the actual Madison Scouts speed.
Sorry to bore you non-musical readers with that band mumbo jumbo. Maybe when people ask me "How's band?" I should just bore them with stuff like that. However, I do see people asking in the future, "How is teaching?" and possibly even "How is pledging?"
Anyway, I know that I have become severely tragic when it comes to updating this thing. My life is really busy, and while I can't make any promises really, I promise to write at least once a week. As for dumb pe0ple... I see dumb pe0ple living on in The Tiger this year. I mean, I did write about a dumb person for my first column. It was about the re-re Alpha Chi president. Love Alpha Chi... just not her.
In other news, Tiger Band is going well (I know you were wondering... it seems like all anyone ever asks me anymore is "How is band?"). I think by Saturday, we will be krunk like no other. We are definitely getting there. The only problem I have is with my song. Yes... f-ing Captain. It's a GREAT song... don't get me wrong (yay for a rhyme), but I feel like Dr. Spede is stifling how great it could be! Yesterday at practice, I was so pissed. He told me that I was too excited and that I was pushing the band on too much. He also said that last Saturday at the pre-season performance, it was incredibly too fast. The ironic thing about this, is that EVERYONE in the band thought that it was so much better that fast. Dr. Spede almost had an anxiety attack, but in the end it turned out really well. I can clearly remember Dr. Buyer telling me good job as soon as I got down from the podium. It was fast, but I had it in control. Yesterday, he basically told me that I was pushing them too much and that I was making them go too fast. What I don't understand is how I could start the right speed and then all of a sudden speed up in different parts of the song... There are no accelerandos in the song. I'll tell you what my theory is... I start out the tragically slow tempo that Dr. Spede wants it and the drums, who have told me before, take it at the speed they know it to be. That means that even if I start it super slow or outrageously fast, they are going to pretty much play it the speed it is supposed to be... UNLESS a "Crazy in Love" moment happens... where I hear the drum captain tell the line to take it at whatever speed I want it to be and they just follow along (that happened at 90 minutes before kickoff once last year). Anyway, I start really slow because Dr. Spede wants me to, and the drums take it faster because they can... the rest of the band pretty much has all concentration between marching and their music... so I am pretty much aware that they are not watching me... BUT the drummers are... and they expect me to be with them because they ARE looking at me... despite whether the tempo I counted off was to their approval or not. So, I end up wuRkeng it hard up on the podium, while the band who is not watching me listens down to the super-psychotic drummers who are hacking at whatever speed they feel is necessary. You see the pattern? It's confusing I know, but I do believe this is the problem. And this is the solution: PLAY THE SONG FASTER. Everyone will enjoy it faster... mainly the drummers and I, 'cause I feel that the winds are gonna go with whatever we do. So, I think I'm going to talk to Spede about maybe taking it the actual Madison Scouts speed.
Sorry to bore you non-musical readers with that band mumbo jumbo. Maybe when people ask me "How's band?" I should just bore them with stuff like that. However, I do see people asking in the future, "How is teaching?" and possibly even "How is pledging?"
Sunday, August 22, 2004
white flag
So it is Sunday afternoon... a pretty one. I'm sitting here in my room with pretty much nothing to do. But, I am listening to White Flag by Dido... you know a song from The Crush miniseries. There is no crush right now... but it is a really pretty song. Very strong words in it. It shows that just because a relationship is over, that doesn't mean that there can't be feelings of love still there as well.
I don't know why I went and got all emotional like that. I'm sorry. Anyway, band camp is over. I'm glad. I think band is actually becoming a bit of a hassle for me. In the past, I would want nothing more than to be on the practice field all day long every day of the week. This year, I had to push myself (or P.U.S.H. as Dr. Buyer said). I dunno. Is it my age? It's a little disheartening to realize that the one thing that made me so excited is now something that I have to push myself to do. Hopefully that will get better as the season progresses.
And now, my brain is empty.
I was going to write about a certain sorority president, but it would be better suited in dumb pe0ple. But, it is going to be BEST suited in my first opinions column in The Tiger... muah ha ha.
I don't know why I went and got all emotional like that. I'm sorry. Anyway, band camp is over. I'm glad. I think band is actually becoming a bit of a hassle for me. In the past, I would want nothing more than to be on the practice field all day long every day of the week. This year, I had to push myself (or P.U.S.H. as Dr. Buyer said). I dunno. Is it my age? It's a little disheartening to realize that the one thing that made me so excited is now something that I have to push myself to do. Hopefully that will get better as the season progresses.
And now, my brain is empty.
I was going to write about a certain sorority president, but it would be better suited in dumb pe0ple. But, it is going to be BEST suited in my first opinions column in The Tiger... muah ha ha.
Thursday, August 19, 2004
greetings from the apartmeezy
Hello there... I am writing from the comfort of my bedroom in 101 A The Reserve. Can I just say that I LOVE living here. Living off campus with friends is like having a constant party! It's so much fun. I really don't think I could have better roomies. I just hope that it doesn't interfere with classes and work. Judging from the first couple days of class, the block is going to be a bitch. Therefore, I will hereafter refer to the block as "the bitch." This is going to be so serious.
Anyway, it's been a while. Let's see... band is great. I love it. Some people in the band and KKPsi are getting on my nucking ferves... but this year, I have vowed not to act up or involve myself in fraternity drama... but when it comes to the band, I have a responsibilty as drum major to make sure that people aren't being shitty. The biggest problem is people thinking they are better than other people and yelling at them and talking down to them and getting attitudes... and then some people just act up too much. Yes, band is supposed to be fun, but we have work to do... LOTS of it... Poor Captain from Castille... I think the captain and his fleet of ships sank yesterday at practice... we are struggling. I feel like I am only conducting the drumline because the wind players are SO into trying to get the right spot on the field and/or playing the right notes that they aren't really paying attention to the tempo. I feel a little helpless... I've felt this way before about band... as drum major, sometimes you feel so disconnected from the players being up there and on that podium... especially when people say they don't pay attention to you anyway... yeah, thanks for that.
Enough about the band though... we have a lot of shit to put up with. Last night I listened to the president of Clemson's Alpha Chi Omega chapter talk trash about the band. I'm not going to go into it... She got what she deserved last night... and I just WISH someone would trash talk us again... it kinda shocks people when I get pissed, but after I have said my peace, they get the picture. Alpha Chi Omega only has 3 things going for it now as far as I'm concerned... Kate Moon, Kate Ramage, and Cassie Owens. The president... whoever the ho is... she can get hit by a CAT bus for all I care.
I think that is all... this is going to be a busy semester, so I don't know how often I will write... and the internet here at The Reserve is not extremely dependable. Plus I will be writing for The Tiger also... so who knows. I might be ending delightful* a little sooner than I had expected.... or maybe just at least for this season... I have been having Delia, Mishelle, and Elle withdrawal. I am going to write this afternoon though... we got out of class early because the lady never showed up. HEE HEE. Anyway... I have until 3:15 to sit around and do nothing... then I go see my kids at Seneca High! I have missed them so!
I'll try not to be a stranger...
Anyway, it's been a while. Let's see... band is great. I love it. Some people in the band and KKPsi are getting on my nucking ferves... but this year, I have vowed not to act up or involve myself in fraternity drama... but when it comes to the band, I have a responsibilty as drum major to make sure that people aren't being shitty. The biggest problem is people thinking they are better than other people and yelling at them and talking down to them and getting attitudes... and then some people just act up too much. Yes, band is supposed to be fun, but we have work to do... LOTS of it... Poor Captain from Castille... I think the captain and his fleet of ships sank yesterday at practice... we are struggling. I feel like I am only conducting the drumline because the wind players are SO into trying to get the right spot on the field and/or playing the right notes that they aren't really paying attention to the tempo. I feel a little helpless... I've felt this way before about band... as drum major, sometimes you feel so disconnected from the players being up there and on that podium... especially when people say they don't pay attention to you anyway... yeah, thanks for that.
Enough about the band though... we have a lot of shit to put up with. Last night I listened to the president of Clemson's Alpha Chi Omega chapter talk trash about the band. I'm not going to go into it... She got what she deserved last night... and I just WISH someone would trash talk us again... it kinda shocks people when I get pissed, but after I have said my peace, they get the picture. Alpha Chi Omega only has 3 things going for it now as far as I'm concerned... Kate Moon, Kate Ramage, and Cassie Owens. The president... whoever the ho is... she can get hit by a CAT bus for all I care.
I think that is all... this is going to be a busy semester, so I don't know how often I will write... and the internet here at The Reserve is not extremely dependable. Plus I will be writing for The Tiger also... so who knows. I might be ending delightful* a little sooner than I had expected.... or maybe just at least for this season... I have been having Delia, Mishelle, and Elle withdrawal. I am going to write this afternoon though... we got out of class early because the lady never showed up. HEE HEE. Anyway... I have until 3:15 to sit around and do nothing... then I go see my kids at Seneca High! I have missed them so!
I'll try not to be a stranger...
Saturday, August 14, 2004
moving day
Sunday, August 15, 2004.
Saturday, August 7, 2004.
Thursday, May 27, 2004.
Monday, May 10, 2004.
All of these days make up the moving days of the summer. They sucked. Well, the first date is today's date. I don't really know if it is going to suck, but I am almost certain that it will. I am addressing you from the living room of Club 1-Tweezy. I am sitting on the sofa, which I will attempt to sleep on shortly. Miriam, Renata, Sammie, and Karen have so graciously allowed me to stay here all week. I am actually blogging on Karen's computer. It really makes me appreciate my brothers... even if today, the first day of outdoor rehearsal, people got all hot and bothered. I didn't though. My approach for this year is to not say anything. So with that...
We move in at noon... this sucks. Not only is it at the heat of the day, but it only gives us an hour and a half before we have to be at the band room for rehearsal. On top of that, I have to go to rehearsal nicely dressed because I have a scholarship dinner at 5:30... luckily, this year I will be able to attend. In the past, band got in the way, but this year, things are working out perfectly. Anyway, I will probably have to conduct Captain during rehearsal tomorrow as well. So if I'm not sweaty from moving, I will be from that. After dinner, there is outdoor rehearsal, which is mainly going to be pre-game. That won't be terrible, although I lack patience for watching the band do things that I really can't be involved in. After all that, I finally get to move in whatever I didn't get moved in at noon. Then I can stay up until only God knows when, cuttin' up with the roomies and trying to unpack. And at 9 on Monday, there's more band.
::sigh::
I love it.
And on a side note... Damn, Vanessa Huxtable has got a mess of hair on this episode.
Saturday, August 7, 2004.
Thursday, May 27, 2004.
Monday, May 10, 2004.
All of these days make up the moving days of the summer. They sucked. Well, the first date is today's date. I don't really know if it is going to suck, but I am almost certain that it will. I am addressing you from the living room of Club 1-Tweezy. I am sitting on the sofa, which I will attempt to sleep on shortly. Miriam, Renata, Sammie, and Karen have so graciously allowed me to stay here all week. I am actually blogging on Karen's computer. It really makes me appreciate my brothers... even if today, the first day of outdoor rehearsal, people got all hot and bothered. I didn't though. My approach for this year is to not say anything. So with that...
We move in at noon... this sucks. Not only is it at the heat of the day, but it only gives us an hour and a half before we have to be at the band room for rehearsal. On top of that, I have to go to rehearsal nicely dressed because I have a scholarship dinner at 5:30... luckily, this year I will be able to attend. In the past, band got in the way, but this year, things are working out perfectly. Anyway, I will probably have to conduct Captain during rehearsal tomorrow as well. So if I'm not sweaty from moving, I will be from that. After dinner, there is outdoor rehearsal, which is mainly going to be pre-game. That won't be terrible, although I lack patience for watching the band do things that I really can't be involved in. After all that, I finally get to move in whatever I didn't get moved in at noon. Then I can stay up until only God knows when, cuttin' up with the roomies and trying to unpack. And at 9 on Monday, there's more band.
::sigh::
I love it.
And on a side note... Damn, Vanessa Huxtable has got a mess of hair on this episode.
Wednesday, August 11, 2004
twenty one
Greetings... from the land of the legal. I am 21 years old and it feels great. Just to know that I can walk into a bar and order a beer and it will be perfectly fine to do so (don't worry, I am not planning on turning into a lush). But, yeah, the day is finally here, and ironically, I am more excited about the next 4 days than I am about today. I mean, I will be 21 all year... I will be legal for the rest of my life. But the first day of my last year in band will only come once, and so will the day that I move into my first apartment. I honestly can't wait, and the excitement about these two events is overshadowing the pleasure of being 21.
That is pretty much all I have to say... I mean, things are good. I am at home in Greenville right now, but this week, I am staying at Club 1-Tweezy (Miriam, Renata, Sammie, and Karen's) so I wouldn't have to carry all my stuff back here to Greenville. It is a lot of fun staying there, and I am SO grateful to have brothers like them that will let me crash there for a whole week. Just like Hoke, they personify the word "brother."
I think that is all... I am seriously more interested in the life of Miss Delia Johnson right now... I have been writing in there lots more than in here...
OH!!! I got the BEST birthday present yesterday... Well, since Club 1-Tweezy has DirecTV, there are like a seventy-leven billion stations on there. I was watching Oxygen yesterday, and THE FINAL EPISODE OF ROSEANNE AIRED! I was in heaven! Seeing how I haven't even watched regular episodes in like 2 weeks because of Dookieblue not having cable the last stretch of camp, I was completely overjoyed to watch it. It was just as touching as I imagined... when Roseanne explained the whole thing about Dan and his heart attack, I kinda teared up a little... ugh... that show. It really does something to me. I am a Roseanne freak... and damn proud of it!
Okay... see, the entry wasn't so short after all. You got a little more than you bargained for. Well, I hope this holds all you readers for a little while... I don't have much access to a computer right now, seeing how mine is sitting on the floor in pieces at Club 1-Tweezy. I am sure once band starts, I will have lots and lots to talk about. Until next time...
That is pretty much all I have to say... I mean, things are good. I am at home in Greenville right now, but this week, I am staying at Club 1-Tweezy (Miriam, Renata, Sammie, and Karen's) so I wouldn't have to carry all my stuff back here to Greenville. It is a lot of fun staying there, and I am SO grateful to have brothers like them that will let me crash there for a whole week. Just like Hoke, they personify the word "brother."
I think that is all... I am seriously more interested in the life of Miss Delia Johnson right now... I have been writing in there lots more than in here...
OH!!! I got the BEST birthday present yesterday... Well, since Club 1-Tweezy has DirecTV, there are like a seventy-leven billion stations on there. I was watching Oxygen yesterday, and THE FINAL EPISODE OF ROSEANNE AIRED! I was in heaven! Seeing how I haven't even watched regular episodes in like 2 weeks because of Dookieblue not having cable the last stretch of camp, I was completely overjoyed to watch it. It was just as touching as I imagined... when Roseanne explained the whole thing about Dan and his heart attack, I kinda teared up a little... ugh... that show. It really does something to me. I am a Roseanne freak... and damn proud of it!
Okay... see, the entry wasn't so short after all. You got a little more than you bargained for. Well, I hope this holds all you readers for a little while... I don't have much access to a computer right now, seeing how mine is sitting on the floor in pieces at Club 1-Tweezy. I am sure once band starts, I will have lots and lots to talk about. Until next time...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MIRIAM AND ME!
...and actor, Will Friedel who starred as Eric on Boy Meets World. Yes... the television was my babysitter.
Thursday, August 05, 2004
night 1 of 2...
...left here in Dookieblue (for all of you who failed to catch on that I renamed this crackhouse of a dorm Dookieblue, I am talking about Mauldin Hall). I have NEVER been more excited to leave a place in my life... except for maybe leaving Claflin that week when I went there for camp the summer before 9th grade.
Anyway... I don't have much on my mind. I talked to my mom and dad both today... Sadly (yes, I realize that what I am about to say is sad), whenever I talk to them on the phone, my spirits sink... like, I could be talking to some friends or something and carrying on a good, fun conversation, and then one of them calls, I answer the phone and just plummet into a pit of monotonous auto-chat. It shouldn't be that way. I should be glad to talk to my parents... but I'm not. As a matter of fact, my dad called while we were playing a game this evening and I looked at the phone, rolled my eyes, and turned the phone off. I did call him back though... when I did, he called to ask about a day that the two of us could get together and do something... by something, I mean something, 'cause I really didn't know what he was talking about. He asked when I was coming home, and I told him that I really didn't have any plans of coming home except on my birthday to drop off stuff that I won't need for the apartment and pick up some of the things that are still there at the house. He got (excuse me) sounded upset that I wasn't going to be available past the 11th... but I told him (in an equally frustrated tone) that it wasn't my fault that band starts the 12th... I really think that a lot of this freaking out by my parents is an effect of one or a combination of these upcoming events:
1. August 11, 2004 - The 21st Birthday... If 18 didn't mean I was an adult, 21 really does... ALCOHOL.
2. May 13, 2005 - Graduation... I will have a bachelors degree... the same thing my mom has... does she think that I think that will make us equal??? Please, I know better.
3. August/September 2005 - Grad School... They will have to let go again... and they will have to get over the fact that I will be in a completely different state.
The main cause being... I AM GROWING UP. I might be wrong, but I don't think they can handle it.
Anyway... what else was I going to write about??? Oh. Grad school... Well, as for Australia, I am not even motivated to try... my parents are freaking out that I am about to start a new chapter in my life here in the same country, so I don't even want to begin thinking about "reasoning" with them about Australia. I was set on UGA... but ever since going up to New Brunswick, Rutgers has been looking more and more appealing. It is far away but close to my godparents, in a completely different part of the country, has a really good school of education, EXACTLY what I want to major in, and the opportunity to start all over again and make completely new friends (not that I don't like my friends here at Clemson... I just didn't get to start fresh since so many people came here from Eastside). At any rate, both UGA and Rutgers have their perks... I will go first to the school that I get accepted to, and then to the school that is cheaper.
It was me looking at Rutgers and their band program that brought me all the way back to the sound of the psi. They don't have a KKPsi chapter... or at least an active one. Want some juicy KKPsi gossip? Go here and read the story of Mu Upsilon Alpha. It kinda made me think... if I go to Rutgers, my KKPsi days this year will truly be my last. There is no way that I would ever join the organization they have there... it violates my vows. Then I was just overcome with the simple fact that, "I am a brother of KKPsi..." And NOTHING EVER can change that. There is no way that I can erase the events of March 28, 2002 from my mind... every day since that date, I have been a brother of this organization... even as an active brother in a chapter full of drama, I wear the letters of the organization... even as an inactive brother, I am just that... INACTIVE, but still a brother of KKPsi... there is no getting around it. And there is no reason to deny that which I am... it would be like me saying that I am not my parents' child... despite all of my issues with them, I am still Brenda and Toney's kid... their soon to be 21 year old kid, but their kid, yet and still.
Anyway... I don't have much on my mind. I talked to my mom and dad both today... Sadly (yes, I realize that what I am about to say is sad), whenever I talk to them on the phone, my spirits sink... like, I could be talking to some friends or something and carrying on a good, fun conversation, and then one of them calls, I answer the phone and just plummet into a pit of monotonous auto-chat. It shouldn't be that way. I should be glad to talk to my parents... but I'm not. As a matter of fact, my dad called while we were playing a game this evening and I looked at the phone, rolled my eyes, and turned the phone off. I did call him back though... when I did, he called to ask about a day that the two of us could get together and do something... by something, I mean something, 'cause I really didn't know what he was talking about. He asked when I was coming home, and I told him that I really didn't have any plans of coming home except on my birthday to drop off stuff that I won't need for the apartment and pick up some of the things that are still there at the house. He got (excuse me) sounded upset that I wasn't going to be available past the 11th... but I told him (in an equally frustrated tone) that it wasn't my fault that band starts the 12th... I really think that a lot of this freaking out by my parents is an effect of one or a combination of these upcoming events:
1. August 11, 2004 - The 21st Birthday... If 18 didn't mean I was an adult, 21 really does... ALCOHOL.
2. May 13, 2005 - Graduation... I will have a bachelors degree... the same thing my mom has... does she think that I think that will make us equal??? Please, I know better.
3. August/September 2005 - Grad School... They will have to let go again... and they will have to get over the fact that I will be in a completely different state.
The main cause being... I AM GROWING UP. I might be wrong, but I don't think they can handle it.
Anyway... what else was I going to write about??? Oh. Grad school... Well, as for Australia, I am not even motivated to try... my parents are freaking out that I am about to start a new chapter in my life here in the same country, so I don't even want to begin thinking about "reasoning" with them about Australia. I was set on UGA... but ever since going up to New Brunswick, Rutgers has been looking more and more appealing. It is far away but close to my godparents, in a completely different part of the country, has a really good school of education, EXACTLY what I want to major in, and the opportunity to start all over again and make completely new friends (not that I don't like my friends here at Clemson... I just didn't get to start fresh since so many people came here from Eastside). At any rate, both UGA and Rutgers have their perks... I will go first to the school that I get accepted to, and then to the school that is cheaper.
It was me looking at Rutgers and their band program that brought me all the way back to the sound of the psi. They don't have a KKPsi chapter... or at least an active one. Want some juicy KKPsi gossip? Go here and read the story of Mu Upsilon Alpha. It kinda made me think... if I go to Rutgers, my KKPsi days this year will truly be my last. There is no way that I would ever join the organization they have there... it violates my vows. Then I was just overcome with the simple fact that, "I am a brother of KKPsi..." And NOTHING EVER can change that. There is no way that I can erase the events of March 28, 2002 from my mind... every day since that date, I have been a brother of this organization... even as an active brother in a chapter full of drama, I wear the letters of the organization... even as an inactive brother, I am just that... INACTIVE, but still a brother of KKPsi... there is no getting around it. And there is no reason to deny that which I am... it would be like me saying that I am not my parents' child... despite all of my issues with them, I am still Brenda and Toney's kid... their soon to be 21 year old kid, but their kid, yet and still.
Monday, August 02, 2004
and at the end of the day, blue is still blue...
So I just got back from New Jersey... like seriously only 30 minutes ago. I am really tired, but in a really thoughtful mood... so, here goes.
I really do think my parents loathe me... and for good reason. Apparently, I am nothing that they raised me to be. I am not respectful, too logical, and don't present myself well... according to them, that is. Once when I was home, I was told that I didn't participate in things with the family enough... like when I came home, all I did was sit at the computer (I can't help it, i like to write). Well, it seems that everytime a conversation (CONVERSATION, NOT ARGUMENT) started on this weekend's trip, it turned into something negative. I don't mind talking to them, I just think that they don't realize that when I talk, I am doing just that... TALKING. I have no intention on getting into a heated argument. I can't even think of one specific incident where this occurred... but all you need to know is that it happened.
I suppose that covers how I am disrespectful... my conversations are apparently taken as me "talking back." They just got done warning me that it was inapporpriate to talk back to people older than me in the real world. Do they really think that I am going to carry on like that with people who are in positions above me? I mean, I would assume that in a CONVERSATION with my parents, a little humorous arrogance would be welcome. I guess not... so once again, back to the computer when I am at home for extended periods of time.
Anyway, that leads me to how I present myself. This was nothing more than insulting. Seriously. My parents think that I am incapable of dressing appropriately. I found this out when I went to church in my brown sandals... or flip flops as my mom informed me. You know, they were the nice brown kind... not like electric blue and green or anything. I wore them with my khakis, brown belt, and brand new J. Crew yellow polo shirt. This apparently and all of a sudden, is inappropriate for church... ALL MY LIFE, I have been told that for church, God welcomes you to "come as you are." I mean, if I was coming as I was, I think I was coming pretty nicely. I have to admit, I would have liked to wear shoes, but I didn't pack any and when I went to the mall to find some, I didn't see any that I liked. So, I ATTEMPTED to go to church in my sandals, but my mom made me put on my brothers Firkenstocks (yes, Firkenstocks with an F... they are so knock offs). Anyway, at brunch later that afternoon, I was informed that I am to always wear a tie to church... THAT IS THE REASON WHY PEOPLE DON'T GO TO CHURCH RIGHT THERE!!! 'CAUSE PEOPLE ARE TOO HUNG UP ON WHAT PEOPLE ARE WEARING (this has lead me to a breakthrough in my Christianity, which I will address shortly). Anyway, my dad told me to ask my godfather, who is the GM of the Hyatt we were staying at, who would get farther in an interview, J. Crew me, or the model tie wearing black Baptist church member Donovan. Larry said, "Well, Donovan would definitely get farther in the interview." Yes. Thank you, Larry. Honestly though, if I was coming to interview at the Hyatt, I would wear a tie... but WAS I? NO! And I didn't dare bring this point to my dad's attention, because that would have been considered reasoning... which I do too much of. SO... I have come to tell myself, instead of Teddy Roosevelt's "Speak softly and carry a big stick," "Don't speak at all and carry a duffle bag full of humility." It just doesn't make any sense to try to carry on a conversation with them if all I am going to do is be considered disrespectful and too logical. My dad says that I will argue my way out of a paper bag... I DON'T ARGUE WITH PEOPLE! If anything, he should know how much of a personal person that I am... if it weren't for this blog, so many people would really not know how to take me... then again, I can talk to my friends without them thinking I'm trying to argue with them.
Lastly, my Christianity... I have decided from this trip, that I cannot stand the whole be like everyone else mindset. Yes, I am a Christian, but I am no where as devout as my dad the Master of Divinity and my mom the preacher's wife. I feel like I have to be as praying out loud and Bible reading as them... I shouldn't have to feel that way. In all honesty, I believe that a person's relationship with God is just that... THEIRS. No one should feel obligated to do anything. Like, my mom... she always tells me that when I'm in church I should smile. WHY SHOULD I SMILE WHEN THERE IS NOTHING TO SMILE ABOUT? I am sitting there listening to what is going on... why should I paint on the grin of a Cheshire cat... so other people in the audience can look at me and say, "Lawd'a mercy that boy's got the spirit comin' outta his ears! JEEEESUS, look at that smile! Hallelujah!" Frankly... I don't care what Sista So-and-so says about me... I go to church for God... not to parade around in leatheri shoes and a silk tie or so everyone can see my Crest smile.
Okay. I think I'm done. I said all of that to say, "and at the end of the day, blue is still blue." Blue is my favorite color and it is something that defines me. In the color blue I find peace and happiness. I could honestly stare smiling at a cloudless sky all day long (I guess that is how you could get me to smile in church). Just like blue is my favorite color, and day in and day out it will remain blue, I will be me... regardless of what anyone says. I hate that I come off as disrespectful and too logical, but it isn't my intention... I can only be me.
I really do think my parents loathe me... and for good reason. Apparently, I am nothing that they raised me to be. I am not respectful, too logical, and don't present myself well... according to them, that is. Once when I was home, I was told that I didn't participate in things with the family enough... like when I came home, all I did was sit at the computer (I can't help it, i like to write). Well, it seems that everytime a conversation (CONVERSATION, NOT ARGUMENT) started on this weekend's trip, it turned into something negative. I don't mind talking to them, I just think that they don't realize that when I talk, I am doing just that... TALKING. I have no intention on getting into a heated argument. I can't even think of one specific incident where this occurred... but all you need to know is that it happened.
I suppose that covers how I am disrespectful... my conversations are apparently taken as me "talking back." They just got done warning me that it was inapporpriate to talk back to people older than me in the real world. Do they really think that I am going to carry on like that with people who are in positions above me? I mean, I would assume that in a CONVERSATION with my parents, a little humorous arrogance would be welcome. I guess not... so once again, back to the computer when I am at home for extended periods of time.
Anyway, that leads me to how I present myself. This was nothing more than insulting. Seriously. My parents think that I am incapable of dressing appropriately. I found this out when I went to church in my brown sandals... or flip flops as my mom informed me. You know, they were the nice brown kind... not like electric blue and green or anything. I wore them with my khakis, brown belt, and brand new J. Crew yellow polo shirt. This apparently and all of a sudden, is inappropriate for church... ALL MY LIFE, I have been told that for church, God welcomes you to "come as you are." I mean, if I was coming as I was, I think I was coming pretty nicely. I have to admit, I would have liked to wear shoes, but I didn't pack any and when I went to the mall to find some, I didn't see any that I liked. So, I ATTEMPTED to go to church in my sandals, but my mom made me put on my brothers Firkenstocks (yes, Firkenstocks with an F... they are so knock offs). Anyway, at brunch later that afternoon, I was informed that I am to always wear a tie to church... THAT IS THE REASON WHY PEOPLE DON'T GO TO CHURCH RIGHT THERE!!! 'CAUSE PEOPLE ARE TOO HUNG UP ON WHAT PEOPLE ARE WEARING (this has lead me to a breakthrough in my Christianity, which I will address shortly). Anyway, my dad told me to ask my godfather, who is the GM of the Hyatt we were staying at, who would get farther in an interview, J. Crew me, or the model tie wearing black Baptist church member Donovan. Larry said, "Well, Donovan would definitely get farther in the interview." Yes. Thank you, Larry. Honestly though, if I was coming to interview at the Hyatt, I would wear a tie... but WAS I? NO! And I didn't dare bring this point to my dad's attention, because that would have been considered reasoning... which I do too much of. SO... I have come to tell myself, instead of Teddy Roosevelt's "Speak softly and carry a big stick," "Don't speak at all and carry a duffle bag full of humility." It just doesn't make any sense to try to carry on a conversation with them if all I am going to do is be considered disrespectful and too logical. My dad says that I will argue my way out of a paper bag... I DON'T ARGUE WITH PEOPLE! If anything, he should know how much of a personal person that I am... if it weren't for this blog, so many people would really not know how to take me... then again, I can talk to my friends without them thinking I'm trying to argue with them.
Lastly, my Christianity... I have decided from this trip, that I cannot stand the whole be like everyone else mindset. Yes, I am a Christian, but I am no where as devout as my dad the Master of Divinity and my mom the preacher's wife. I feel like I have to be as praying out loud and Bible reading as them... I shouldn't have to feel that way. In all honesty, I believe that a person's relationship with God is just that... THEIRS. No one should feel obligated to do anything. Like, my mom... she always tells me that when I'm in church I should smile. WHY SHOULD I SMILE WHEN THERE IS NOTHING TO SMILE ABOUT? I am sitting there listening to what is going on... why should I paint on the grin of a Cheshire cat... so other people in the audience can look at me and say, "Lawd'a mercy that boy's got the spirit comin' outta his ears! JEEEESUS, look at that smile! Hallelujah!" Frankly... I don't care what Sista So-and-so says about me... I go to church for God... not to parade around in leatheri shoes and a silk tie or so everyone can see my Crest smile.
Okay. I think I'm done. I said all of that to say, "and at the end of the day, blue is still blue." Blue is my favorite color and it is something that defines me. In the color blue I find peace and happiness. I could honestly stare smiling at a cloudless sky all day long (I guess that is how you could get me to smile in church). Just like blue is my favorite color, and day in and day out it will remain blue, I will be me... regardless of what anyone says. I hate that I come off as disrespectful and too logical, but it isn't my intention... I can only be me.
Sunday, August 01, 2004
new brunswick
Well, I am here in the computer lab of the Hyatt Regency, New Brunswick and I just have a couple of things to report. I have to hurry because there is a hottie that needs in here in about 15 minutes!
1. New Brunswick is a very cool city. I lived here with my godparents the entire summer before 11th grade, but surprisingly enough, I have learned and seen more this weekend than I did all that summer.
2. Among what I learned, I learned that Rutgers University which is here in New Brunswick has one of the best graduate schools of education in the country... including my area or specialization. So, I am going to apply here as well as UGA. It should be good because I need a backup school to UGA and also, if I came here, I would really be getting out of my element.
3. Speaking of out of my element, I love the north. There are so many different types of people. It isn't just black and white... it's so diverse here and I absolutely love it (another plus for Rutgers). I went to New York City today... exciting, but honestly, WAY TOO BIG FOR ME!
4. I do not like sports. Call me a wus, pussy, pansy, loser... but I can't get into sports the way some people can. Being around my cousin and brother drives me insane though because all they do is watch SportsCenter all the time... I swear, if I hear anything else about Nomar Garciaparra, I will choke a bitch...
5. This vacation has been brought to you by my parents. My sanity has also been taken away by them.
6. I am ready to go back to camp... pack it up, and get it out! Important dates coming up...
8/7 - last day of camp, Missy's birthday
8/11 - MIRIAM AND MY 21st BIRTHDAY... YES... BRING OUT THE BUBBLY!
8/12 - section eaders and assistants report for band camp
8/13 - EVERYONE for band camp!
8/15 - THE RESERVE WITH THE COOLEST ROOMMATES KNOWN TO MANKIND!
Okay, that cutie can come back here and kick me out now! See you back down below the Mason Dixon...
1. New Brunswick is a very cool city. I lived here with my godparents the entire summer before 11th grade, but surprisingly enough, I have learned and seen more this weekend than I did all that summer.
2. Among what I learned, I learned that Rutgers University which is here in New Brunswick has one of the best graduate schools of education in the country... including my area or specialization. So, I am going to apply here as well as UGA. It should be good because I need a backup school to UGA and also, if I came here, I would really be getting out of my element.
3. Speaking of out of my element, I love the north. There are so many different types of people. It isn't just black and white... it's so diverse here and I absolutely love it (another plus for Rutgers). I went to New York City today... exciting, but honestly, WAY TOO BIG FOR ME!
4. I do not like sports. Call me a wus, pussy, pansy, loser... but I can't get into sports the way some people can. Being around my cousin and brother drives me insane though because all they do is watch SportsCenter all the time... I swear, if I hear anything else about Nomar Garciaparra, I will choke a bitch...
5. This vacation has been brought to you by my parents. My sanity has also been taken away by them.
6. I am ready to go back to camp... pack it up, and get it out! Important dates coming up...
8/7 - last day of camp, Missy's birthday
8/11 - MIRIAM AND MY 21st BIRTHDAY... YES... BRING OUT THE BUBBLY!
8/12 - section eaders and assistants report for band camp
8/13 - EVERYONE for band camp!
8/15 - THE RESERVE WITH THE COOLEST ROOMMATES KNOWN TO MANKIND!
Okay, that cutie can come back here and kick me out now! See you back down below the Mason Dixon...
Tuesday, July 27, 2004
it's a brotherhood
So a few minutes ago, as I was walking the kids to class, I spotted a rare specimen. A KKPsi brother that I didn't recognize. His royal blue shirt with the letters Kappa, Kappa, and Psi on the left breast made me jump to two conclusions:
1. As has happened before, someone has stolen a brother's shirt from the laundry.
2. He is a brother from another chapter.
He was walking out of Lowry as I was ushering the kids in to go to class. When he had passed me by, I looked at the back of the shirt to see if there was anything recognizeable about it or whether it gave a chapter name or event or something. All I could read were the words Alpha Sigma on the back of the shirt, so I immediately figured he was from the Alpha Sigma chapter.
Well, after all the kids had made it safely inside Lowry, I hurried behind the guy and the girl that was with him. I stopped him and asked him if he was a brother and he said yes. I introduced myself as a brother from Clemson and he told me that his name (I was so overwhelemed that I can't remember his name now). He and the girl that was from the Epsilon Xi chapter (Alpha Sigma was his pledge class) at The University of Miami, Ohio. He told me that he was at Clemson looking at graduate programs. He then asked if I could show them to Barre Hall. So, we began to walk and shared information about our respective bands and chapters. Then the girl spoke up. It turns out that she is a brother from Epsilon Xi too! (I remember her name) Her name is Christina and she is a sophomore accompanying the guy on his visit. I showed them to Barre and then we shook hands and went our separate ways. It was so cool... and it was just what I needed.
So many times, I get SO fed up with Kappa Beta and KKPsi here at Clemson. But in reality, Kappa Beta is such a small part of the big huge picture that is Kappa Kappa Psi. It is a HUGE brotherhood that spans the nation and for me to have such a negative attitude because of a few experiences I have with a small group of people out of thousands is ridiculous.
So, to simply sum it all up, I will quote a verse from our fraternity song...
This brotherhood that binds us all together
It will be strong and never will die
It's built on love we have for our fraternity
Here's a toast to Kappa Kappa Psi
To Kappa Kappa Psi!
1. As has happened before, someone has stolen a brother's shirt from the laundry.
2. He is a brother from another chapter.
He was walking out of Lowry as I was ushering the kids in to go to class. When he had passed me by, I looked at the back of the shirt to see if there was anything recognizeable about it or whether it gave a chapter name or event or something. All I could read were the words Alpha Sigma on the back of the shirt, so I immediately figured he was from the Alpha Sigma chapter.
Well, after all the kids had made it safely inside Lowry, I hurried behind the guy and the girl that was with him. I stopped him and asked him if he was a brother and he said yes. I introduced myself as a brother from Clemson and he told me that his name (I was so overwhelemed that I can't remember his name now). He and the girl that was from the Epsilon Xi chapter (Alpha Sigma was his pledge class) at The University of Miami, Ohio. He told me that he was at Clemson looking at graduate programs. He then asked if I could show them to Barre Hall. So, we began to walk and shared information about our respective bands and chapters. Then the girl spoke up. It turns out that she is a brother from Epsilon Xi too! (I remember her name) Her name is Christina and she is a sophomore accompanying the guy on his visit. I showed them to Barre and then we shook hands and went our separate ways. It was so cool... and it was just what I needed.
So many times, I get SO fed up with Kappa Beta and KKPsi here at Clemson. But in reality, Kappa Beta is such a small part of the big huge picture that is Kappa Kappa Psi. It is a HUGE brotherhood that spans the nation and for me to have such a negative attitude because of a few experiences I have with a small group of people out of thousands is ridiculous.
So, to simply sum it all up, I will quote a verse from our fraternity song...
This brotherhood that binds us all together
It will be strong and never will die
It's built on love we have for our fraternity
Here's a toast to Kappa Kappa Psi
To Kappa Kappa Psi!
Monday, July 26, 2004
people
::sigh::
Sometimes, I just get frustrated with people. I'm sorry. I just can't stomach some people... the people that take things WAY too serious... the people who think that what they say is gold and cannot be disputed... the people who talk down to other people just because they can... the people who think they've got it all figured out... the people who try to run stuff when things are meant to be a collaborative effort... the people who want to be grown but are in essence very immature...
These people make life difficult for me. These people are blogworthy... they inhabit my thoughts so much that I have to put them in here (this little "box" as the brothers of Gamma Xi say) so I won't have to think about them so much.
These people make me seem like a mean person. I'm really not. It's just these people... they just bring out the worst in me. I can't help it. Time after time, I sit there while some people are talking or being their obnoxious selves and try to keep my face from contorting into a scowl. Often, I just look like I am staring blankly into space or like I am just not interested... but in reality, EVERYTHING the person is saying is sinking deep deep within me and it is permeating the innermost layer of my soul... the part that even though is highly internal, it is the most sensitive. I hear what the person is saying sometimes, and I just say to myself, "Don't respond... Just thank God that you aren't like that." I mean, is that conceited? Yeah, I would imagine, 'cause frankly, some of the stuff that I sit through and listen to makes me feel "10 Times Stupid" as Nathan Smith once said.
I really do sit there and think to myself, "What am I getting from listening to this? Entertainment? Anger? Any emotion at all?" If I am getting entertainment, then I usually join into the conversation. If I feel like I am going to get angry, I usually listen intently and make my own comments in my head... only seldom do I share those comments with people (until recently). If I am not getting any emotion at all, then the conversation is nothing but words floating in the air... I'm usually completely aloof to these types of conversations.
I've said all of this to say, interaction with some people is pointless. I am just going to either be annoyed or bored with some people... so, I feel as if it would be best if I just kept to myself sometimes. I mean, I am not a recluse or anything. I honestly get emotionally disturbed when dealing with some people...
...So from now on, don't take my silence or absence as me being unsociable or sadiddy (I love that word). Some people are honestly just "wasting my life" as Penelope Taynt says.
Sometimes, I just get frustrated with people. I'm sorry. I just can't stomach some people... the people that take things WAY too serious... the people who think that what they say is gold and cannot be disputed... the people who talk down to other people just because they can... the people who think they've got it all figured out... the people who try to run stuff when things are meant to be a collaborative effort... the people who want to be grown but are in essence very immature...
These people make life difficult for me. These people are blogworthy... they inhabit my thoughts so much that I have to put them in here (this little "box" as the brothers of Gamma Xi say) so I won't have to think about them so much.
These people make me seem like a mean person. I'm really not. It's just these people... they just bring out the worst in me. I can't help it. Time after time, I sit there while some people are talking or being their obnoxious selves and try to keep my face from contorting into a scowl. Often, I just look like I am staring blankly into space or like I am just not interested... but in reality, EVERYTHING the person is saying is sinking deep deep within me and it is permeating the innermost layer of my soul... the part that even though is highly internal, it is the most sensitive. I hear what the person is saying sometimes, and I just say to myself, "Don't respond... Just thank God that you aren't like that." I mean, is that conceited? Yeah, I would imagine, 'cause frankly, some of the stuff that I sit through and listen to makes me feel "10 Times Stupid" as Nathan Smith once said.
I really do sit there and think to myself, "What am I getting from listening to this? Entertainment? Anger? Any emotion at all?" If I am getting entertainment, then I usually join into the conversation. If I feel like I am going to get angry, I usually listen intently and make my own comments in my head... only seldom do I share those comments with people (until recently). If I am not getting any emotion at all, then the conversation is nothing but words floating in the air... I'm usually completely aloof to these types of conversations.
I've said all of this to say, interaction with some people is pointless. I am just going to either be annoyed or bored with some people... so, I feel as if it would be best if I just kept to myself sometimes. I mean, I am not a recluse or anything. I honestly get emotionally disturbed when dealing with some people...
...So from now on, don't take my silence or absence as me being unsociable or sadiddy (I love that word). Some people are honestly just "wasting my life" as Penelope Taynt says.
Sunday, July 25, 2004
the king of krunk
So I know just last week I told you that you could call me captain... and I know way back in December, I told you to refer to me as King Congruence. Well, my boys this week have dubbed me "The King of Krunk." I almost fell over laughing the first time I heard it. Lemme tell you how this name came to be...
So on Friday night, the last night for the ridiculous wastes of teenage boys known as "Archies," (architecture students) the biggest sausage fest on the planet was held in room 3C2. I know what you are wondering... how could they throw a party in a dorm room at a summer camp? Well, these kids did it. I came up to my hall and saw little 8th grade Andrew wearing 2 pairs of boxers, 2 pairs of shorts, no shirt, an open jacket with the sleeves rolled up, and two baseball caps. Following closely behind him was his roommate and fellow 8th grader, Daniel. Daniel had 2 pairs of boxers on and his shorts completely unzipped. Everything else about his outfit wasn't that terrible. When I asked them where they were going looking so stupid, they replied, "The party downstairs!" and shot past me. Well, when I got down there, there was seriously a line outside of room 3C2. There was a metal chair sitting on each side of the door and a kid in a black tank top, black shorts, sunglasses, and gelled hair standing in front of it. It was Matt (remember this kid for later in the entry). In the room behind him, there was loud techno music playing. He had a list in his hands that told him who could come into the room and who could not... Excuse me, not the room... The Club. Anyway, needless to say, my name was not on the list, but he said that if I was dressed "fly to super-fly," gave him $2 and/or a canned drink and/or food, I could get in. I then informed him that I was a counselor and could get in if I wanted to, laughed at him, and walked away. On the way back to my room, Will, one of those ridiculous architecture losers, walked by me in tight red pants, no shirt, and a black bowtie. You should know that the Archie boys were VIPs for this "party." So Will, as strangely as he was dressed, was going to get in regardless.
Well, once I got upstairs, I went into Zach's room, where most of my campers were congregated. Needless to say, they didn't get into the party. I then gave them a little pep talk explaining what a sausage fest was for them. I told them that it seemed a little strange that these scantily clad boys were all cramped into a small dorm room with the lights off (oh yeah, when the door to the party opened, I saw that the lights were off) and loud techno music. I harped on the fact that there were NO GIRLS in this room at all... then they realized that the party was the biggest loser fest ever. The boys really just had a bad case of sour grapes, but I tried to make them feel like they weren't missing anything. The real reason they didn't get in was because those Archies, who considered themselves SO cool, did not consider them cool. My campers definitely aren't the fratty type like these Archies and the Archie Entourage (campers that came the Sunday after the Archies first week who were kinda fratty and got in tight with them).
Anyway, we got to talking about some things and then they started poking fun at me talking about how I was an interesting character because I watched Jimmy Neutron and listened to Tipsy. I have to admit... it kinda doesn't match now that I just typed the two in the same sentence. But I told them that I was really a kid at heart and liked to do things kids do... like watch Nickelodeon ALL the time. Then I explained to them why I didn't want them to refer to me as Mr. Hamilton, sir, or counselor. Carl had called me counselor on the first night and I told him that it really made me feel weird. I was like, "Didn't you see my name on my door?" He was like, "Yeah, on that crown? You have lotsa crowns all over the place in there." (since I have been on this King Congruence kick, I have taken a strong liking to crowns... but I don't have many... just the crown from summer camp 2 years ago, my Burger King crown, and the crown on my door that has my name on it) Then Daniel spoke up and said, "Didn't you know? He's the King of Krunk!" They all laughed and I told them that I liked that name... so... now, they all refer to me as the King of Krunk.
The Matt kid that played bouncer outside of Sausage Fest 2004 got arrested later that night for smoking pot.
So on Friday night, the last night for the ridiculous wastes of teenage boys known as "Archies," (architecture students) the biggest sausage fest on the planet was held in room 3C2. I know what you are wondering... how could they throw a party in a dorm room at a summer camp? Well, these kids did it. I came up to my hall and saw little 8th grade Andrew wearing 2 pairs of boxers, 2 pairs of shorts, no shirt, an open jacket with the sleeves rolled up, and two baseball caps. Following closely behind him was his roommate and fellow 8th grader, Daniel. Daniel had 2 pairs of boxers on and his shorts completely unzipped. Everything else about his outfit wasn't that terrible. When I asked them where they were going looking so stupid, they replied, "The party downstairs!" and shot past me. Well, when I got down there, there was seriously a line outside of room 3C2. There was a metal chair sitting on each side of the door and a kid in a black tank top, black shorts, sunglasses, and gelled hair standing in front of it. It was Matt (remember this kid for later in the entry). In the room behind him, there was loud techno music playing. He had a list in his hands that told him who could come into the room and who could not... Excuse me, not the room... The Club. Anyway, needless to say, my name was not on the list, but he said that if I was dressed "fly to super-fly," gave him $2 and/or a canned drink and/or food, I could get in. I then informed him that I was a counselor and could get in if I wanted to, laughed at him, and walked away. On the way back to my room, Will, one of those ridiculous architecture losers, walked by me in tight red pants, no shirt, and a black bowtie. You should know that the Archie boys were VIPs for this "party." So Will, as strangely as he was dressed, was going to get in regardless.
Well, once I got upstairs, I went into Zach's room, where most of my campers were congregated. Needless to say, they didn't get into the party. I then gave them a little pep talk explaining what a sausage fest was for them. I told them that it seemed a little strange that these scantily clad boys were all cramped into a small dorm room with the lights off (oh yeah, when the door to the party opened, I saw that the lights were off) and loud techno music. I harped on the fact that there were NO GIRLS in this room at all... then they realized that the party was the biggest loser fest ever. The boys really just had a bad case of sour grapes, but I tried to make them feel like they weren't missing anything. The real reason they didn't get in was because those Archies, who considered themselves SO cool, did not consider them cool. My campers definitely aren't the fratty type like these Archies and the Archie Entourage (campers that came the Sunday after the Archies first week who were kinda fratty and got in tight with them).
Anyway, we got to talking about some things and then they started poking fun at me talking about how I was an interesting character because I watched Jimmy Neutron and listened to Tipsy. I have to admit... it kinda doesn't match now that I just typed the two in the same sentence. But I told them that I was really a kid at heart and liked to do things kids do... like watch Nickelodeon ALL the time. Then I explained to them why I didn't want them to refer to me as Mr. Hamilton, sir, or counselor. Carl had called me counselor on the first night and I told him that it really made me feel weird. I was like, "Didn't you see my name on my door?" He was like, "Yeah, on that crown? You have lotsa crowns all over the place in there." (since I have been on this King Congruence kick, I have taken a strong liking to crowns... but I don't have many... just the crown from summer camp 2 years ago, my Burger King crown, and the crown on my door that has my name on it) Then Daniel spoke up and said, "Didn't you know? He's the King of Krunk!" They all laughed and I told them that I liked that name... so... now, they all refer to me as the King of Krunk.
The Matt kid that played bouncer outside of Sausage Fest 2004 got arrested later that night for smoking pot.
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