What a ho-bag! Chrissy McChrisserson, you effing skeeze-whore! How dare you try to get up on this poor defenseless guy who hosts this blog! Yeah, sure this is the second time I have infiltrated his blog to post nasty shit about you and your prostitute self, but at least I'm not repaying him with sexual favors! Besides, he's a DUDE! He has a little more than what Rosie O'Donnell and your other bull daggas are interested in.
Like when was the last time you ever gave a guy head? That's what I thought... like back in the 6th grade, you nasty slut! Oh yeah, I know. Debra Peterson is from Aiken too, and she went to your lesbian prep school too.... only thing is that I KNOW she isn't a dyke (she is SO having an I Eta Pi's baby in like 2 months... but I didn't tell you that). Anyway, she told me that on the annual St. Mary's camping trip with the boys of St. Elysius's Catholic Reform School, you were caught down by the lake with your head in some 17 year old's lap (OMG, like how big was he?)! So even back before you were of age, you were sluttin' around like a little tramp.
As for that little comment about my "jungle-ish bush," that just shows how obsessed with poo na-na you are! I know you are dying to see it... it just makes your mouth water everytime you see me doesn't it? Disgusting. Besides, that's SUCH a lie. The reason people think it's all overgrown down there is because at the KFC Toga Party, Brett Bretterson was so trying to cop a feel under my Chaps Ralph Lauren linen toga and I smacked the hell out of his perverted ass before he got to my goodies (I never wear panties when I'm drinking... it just get's too hot, right?). Well, when he woke up, I was standing over him chewing his ass out (and so exposing the fact that he danced with that nasty Tara Reid sized slut, April and then went home and hooked up with Harmony Marie). The hit obviously caused him to see massive dark spots... one of which was situated right between my legs as he looked up my toga. When I realized how big of a skeeze he was being, I stepped on his balls and proceeded to lead the girls in the "KFCs Don't Take No Shit" Cheer. Needless to say, he told the entire Greek Community that I had a George W. Super-bush. But that's ok, 'cause if he does ever have any kids, they will so be cross eyed...
So there you go, Chrissy Mc-lays-your-son... and-daughter. Go crawl back under the MMM you just got done scrumping with... and his girlfriend.
Deidre
Monday, October 17, 2005
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Hey, this is Fran--I'm Chrissy's cousin. She called me up a little while ago, in tears (I could hear her mascara dripping over the phone) and she said there's some Ass Monkey who keeps picking on her on some dude's blog.
Now, I'm not sure what goes on between these sororities--I go to Tri-County Tech, and the closest thing I have to a sorority is when my friends and me beat dead possums with baseball bats.
Anydangway, she told me she's upset that you keep pickin' on her drunk night of muff munchin'. Well, I think you should know that I am a carpet licker myself, and when you take the bull by the horns, well, you get a really pissed off bull dyke.
I thought that maybe I was overreacting, but I asked my longtime companion Moon River what she thought, and she took time out of her busy construction job to sit down with me, drink a few Buds and come up with a plan to kick your ass! So I got my Birkenstocks on, pumped my pick-up with gas and I am ready to pop a Kappa Kappa in your flat ass! You'll know me when you see me--I'll be wearing a bright read bandana with a "My Vulva Ate Your Penis" t-shirt.
Oh, and Chrissy would like to type the following:
Hey, Deidre? Hi, ho. I just wanted to tell you that you I want a written/signed apology (along with the second season DVD set of "One Tree Hill"--love that show) by tomorrow evening or I will unleash the sapphic fury that is Fran.
Heart and Hate you,
Fran & Chrissy
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