1 awful song and 65 fathers

Hey... So, I just got back from church. Not an absolutely exciting Sunday, but a Sunday nontheless. The first thing I have to say is that I realized today that I simply CANNOT stand when something is out of key. It makes me squirm in my seat and want to scream so I can block it out... I mean, it's like the most God awful sound in the world, but if I am not responsible for the sound, then there is nothing I can do about it. Well, I experienced this today at church. I can't think of the song that they were singing, but it's really not important. Well, we got this new Minister of Music last August... I haven't been at church most of the time that she's been there... like, I was sitting there today and realized that she has almost been there for a year, but yet I still pray for her constantly as if she is having to adjust to our church... I know it's gotta be bad. I know that people have quit the choir because our old director isn't there anymore, and I know people talk, and look, and all that other stuff that the good Christian folk just ain't supposed to do. Well, bless her heart, Mrs. Moon (which everyone calls her... which annoys me because no one has taken it upon themselves to get to know her on a first name basis... I myself am guilty) is an exceptional player. I mean, I think anyone who can play by ear AND read music is great... especially on an organ. She is doing a phenomenal job and this was proved when I heard the choir today... while lacking about half to 2/3 of what is normally there, they broke it down. I was so impressed. Anyway, about the awful song... it was devotion. Deacon Willie started singing some song and she got on to play it... Well, he and Ms. Becky started doin' something crazy... like, changing pitches and stuff... I mean, like, people in the congregation were scratchin' their heads and stuff... it was ridiculous. Mrs. Moon had to tap out a chromatic several times in order to find the pitch, and as soon as she did, Deacon Willie and Ms. Becky would jump to another pitch at a different phrase. It was terrible. I just sat there with the most unpleasant look on my face (which is a BIG no no if you are a member of the preacher's family... everything is supposed to be marshmallows and sunshine if your daddy is the pastor). My mom was looking over at me all confused... she told me just yesterday that I look like I'm grimacing all throughout church all the time... so today, I was TRYING to be happy... but the song just wouldn't let me... NOT a joyful noise... but a noise, regardless...

Then there were the 65 fathers... go ahead and take a guess as to what this is that I am talking about... go ahead, I'll wait...

*ELEVATOR MUSIC*

Okay... now I want some of y'all to comment on what you thought it was now, just so I can see what comes to mind when I say 65 fathers. Well, in all reality, 65 fathers is what was said in Minister Freeman's 4 minute prayer. Yes, I'm a heretic... I was doing something other than praying during the prayer. See, this man... God bless him... He's a funny man. And, when he got up to pray, I was like, "Hmm, what is his trademark prayer?" Most people have a trademark about their prayers... Like there is this one guy that will go "Father God" throughout the entire prayer... Rev. Blandin says "Heavenly Father" all the time... Rev. Sis. Griffin has this whole spill that she says at the beginning of every prayer: "All wise... Everlasting... Everlasting God our Heavenly Father..." Yeah, everyone has a trademark. I think mine is like, "Dear God." Anyway, Minister Freeman always goes "Father." And I mean ALL THROUGHOUT HIS PRAYERS! I sat there today and counted... in his 4 minute prayer, he said the word "father" 65 times. That is more than 15 "fathers" in one minute. Wow. Well, I am sure that God heard that... I mean, Minister Freeman called Him enough... Bless his heart.

Ah, church... It's amazing the things you learn from sitting through one service. I think I've said it before... but I can't remember if I hae or haven't... it reminds me A LOT of chapter. Only when people call on God in chapter, they usually tack on another word after it starting with a D...