is that a little snot on your windshield mr. parking nazi, sir?

Okay... remember what I said I would do the next time I saw a parking nazi truck? Well, yesterday... I didn't do it. I was driving into the horseshoe and saw one. I slowed down and got this mischevious little look in my eye... like the one that Max makes when he's about to do something devilish on "Max and Ruby." But, I kept driving, parked my car in a 30 minute spot and ran in the dorm and out just in time to move it.

Well, today, I succeeded in writing that disgustingly snotty ticket to the parking nazis. Missy, Julie, and I were coming out of the Strom Thurmond Institute, where we had to listen to this HORRIBLE speech about the 50 year anniversary of Brown v. Board of Education (and the man giving the speech said "v." not "versus"). There it was. The white Ford pick-up with the orange and purple stripes on the sides. And I was like, "Missy! Give me something to write on! I'm gonna write that ticket!" Julie started laughing hysterically, and Missy rolled her eyes and with a smirk said, "Oh, Lord," as she dug into her bag for something to write on and with. Then she said, "Just don't blow your nose in it, 'cause that would be nasty." Well, in all honesty, I agreed. And I wasn't going to do it, but since she had told me not to, then HELL YEAH I was gonna do it! So I wrote the ticket:

You are a public nuisance to the students on this campus. Choke, please. Fine: $1,000,000 to each Clemson University student.

And then I cleared my sinuses on the sheet of paper and ever so neatly placed it under the windshield wiper on the driver's side of the car. Then I casually walked away and laughed at the thought of some illiterate, illigitimate Pickens county piece of Lake Hartwell trailer trash finding it on their truck. MUAH HA HA HA HEE HEE HEE!

I win.
I fuckin' win.